Re: cs:slight confidence problem - Posted by MichaelR (NoVA)
Posted by MichaelR (NoVA) on January 22, 1999 at 09:45:54:
There are some people who will look at your age and question your ability to follow through on deals. There are also some people who would do the same because you are a male, female, white, black, purple, green, drive a pinto, drive a mercedes, and everything else on the planet.
The majority of these people may have a certain apprehension at the outset if you look your age. But that same majority can easily be eased of that fear by seeing how you conduct yourself, how you speak, how you dress, and/or any number of other factors.
More than just age goes into a person’s perception of you.
One of the beliefs that I hold to be true is that the meaning of my communication is the response that I get.
That’s a pretty clear statement, but I’ve seen people grapple with it so allow me to expand a bit.
Essentially, I’m saying that what you INTEND to happen as a result of something you say means absolutely nothing. The response of the person you are communicating to, is what is the true meaning of what you said or did.
Applying this to the age issue, one could say that if you get the response “too young” or whatever…that it is a result of something you are putting out. Consider everything you can do to convey maturity and wisdom, and you should be fine, but always take time to observe the response you are getting and WHY so that you can adjust you behavior accordingly.
Now, for a little real world advice from someone who has been there.
I started my first business venture back in my pre-pubescent days. After being called “ma’am” one too many times on the telephone, I started deepening my voice. It didn’t always work, and the squeaks were funny as hell to listen in on.
Regardless, in the beginning I found I wasn’t being taken seriously. I probably entertained the thought that it was just not possible because of my age, but if I did it wasn’t for long. I mean, after all, that would mean that I was doomed to school and cartoons for at least a few more years. Yuck.
Instead, I worked on polishing EVERYTHING else to be as effective as possible. And funny things started to happen, specifically, people started paying attention because I sounded, appeared, and presented myself in a way that gave them confidence.
I also made sure our first contact (and preferably only contact) was by phone.
You, being 19, should not have any problems with the meeting part. But using the telephone in a skillful manner, will go a long way to soften or completely eliminate any “age shock” the other person may have.
One other thing.
Once I hit 19-20 or so, I started growing a beard. It puts years on you right away, unless it won’t come in full. Then you just look like an idiot.