Divorce Advice - Posted by Baron

Posted by Tim Fierro (Tacoma, WA) on March 01, 2002 at 02:43:53:

I think I know her! She is my ex’s best friend. :slight_smile:

Divorce Advice - Posted by Baron

Posted by Baron on February 27, 2002 at 11:13:27:

My son wants to get involved with me in real estate investments. Our dilemma is, as he makes more money, the more he has to pay in child support. Don?t get me wrong. He is not trying to be a ?deadbeat? dad. His ex-wife however, is a deadbeat? mom. He is not willing to support her lifestyle.

We see RE as a way to shelter his income. However, as we earn capital gains, for an LLC or Sub ?S?, these gains flow through to his personal 1040. Capital gains would be occasional and a 20% increase in his income translates into more child support. I am aware of 1031 exchanges, but we may not want to use an exchange for whatever reason.

It appears we need to set up a ?C? Cop so these do not flow through to him. This also gives us more control of his income. I am aware of the possible double taxation of the ?C? Corp. But, taxes would be cheaper than paying her. We can accrue deferred income until his children turn 19.

I welcome any advice from someone who has gone through this. If you want to email me, feel free to do so.

Re: Divorce Advice - Posted by Robert (NC)

Posted by Robert (NC) on February 27, 2002 at 15:43:30:

2 options…

  1. Set up a self directed education IRA. This way your son can show that he is saving for his kids college education without giving his ex any money. My wife’s ex never pays his child support we honestly would be happy if he just put a little money aside for their education. Anyway… by setting up the self directed education IRA he can use the money from the IRA for the business and some of the profits flow TAX free and child support free back to the ecuation IRA.
    A friend of mine is doing this and should by the end of next year be able to fully fund his kids college just after 2 years of self directed education IRA

  2. Self directed IRA for himself, same as #1 but for him instead of child education.

  3. Have the LLC pay him a set salary as mentioned in another reply to your post…

Good luck… also if his ex is a dead beat mom, maybe he should try and get custody but that is a personal decision…


Re: Divorce Advice - Posted by Tim Fierro (Tacoma, WA)

Posted by Tim Fierro (Tacoma, WA) on February 27, 2002 at 12:09:42:

If your son pays $500 a month to the ex-wife, and he made $30k a year; then have the corporation give him a salary of $30k a year so the obligation can still be met.

Tell your son to get used to the real world. Some of us have been paying for our ex-wife’s cars, houses, vacations, etc… for years. Sure, I don’t like seeing the ex-wife’s car that I pay for. Sure, I don’t like seeing her house is bigger than mine. Sure, I don’t like that she got to see our daughter more than I over the years. But such is life.

Just remember, her ‘income’ will stop when the child is older; but his income could grow over time.

BTW, my ex-wife has 3 kids from 3 different fathers. Work has not been a word in my ex-wife’s vocabulary. This means no retirement money put away for herself when she is in her retirement years.

However my daughter will be 18 in 25 days and depending on if she goes to college, or just finishes out this last year of high school; my ex is going to lose the $500 a month I give her in the next 6 months or so. My wife and I are wondering what will happen when my daughter is on her own and my ex-wife loses the $500 a month I give. Will she pop out child #4 to get another father to pitch in, or will she at some point in her life, almost 40, finally have to look for full time employment.

Don’t try to avoid the child support, it must be done. While many people don’t agree on some women abusing the system to use the money as income instead of working themselves, the children still need things to live on and that is being taken care of. Deal with it, and live your own life.

Your son does not need divorce advice, nor does he need child support advice, he needs to just get on with his life and don’t let anything stop him from living that life.

You play the hand that you dealt yourself.

Re: Divorce Advice - Posted by Lor

Posted by Lor on February 27, 2002 at 11:34:42:

Your post disgusts me and so do you and your son.

Divorce Advice - Posted by Baron

Posted by Baron on February 27, 2002 at 12:36:19:

This is what I’m looking for. Advice from someone, male or female, that has been through it.

Your situation is very similar to my sons. He recognizes the requirement to pay child support and WANTS to provide for his sons. It’s just that he does not want to suport her lifestyle. It’s bad enough his sons are subjected to her lifestyle.

Thanks for your imput!

Divorce Advice - Posted by Baron

Posted by Baron on February 28, 2002 at 08:00:38:

Please don’t “flame” this lady. She is entitled to her own opinion.

This is a controversial subject. Lor, I do think you misunderstood my intentions. We are not trying to avoid child support. We want to provide for his sons and my grandsons. We just don’t want to enable a decedent lifestyle that these boys would be subject to.


Re: Divorce Advice - Posted by BT

Posted by BT on February 27, 2002 at 22:01:56:

This must hit home for you Lori, are you a dead beat mom? Look at the facts!!!

Re: Whatever Lor! - Posted by GregNY

Posted by GregNY on February 27, 2002 at 14:44:38:

My daughters mother is a highschool drop out that can’t get up early enough to get a job and can’t go to sleep at night because there is always something going on at the bar. I’ve worked for the last 4 years for me, her, and my daughter. She has worked about 6 months out of 36 months. I mean, why should she, public assistance will pay for rent, food, extra cash, I get hit with child support and I support my daughter very well. But I still have to pay support because she is on public assistance. They even pay for after school daycare. She can hang out all night and wake up to get my daughter ready for school then sleep til 5pm. And I pay support just beacuse my daughter lives with her. I buy my daughter what she needs and most of the time what she wants, but do you think the government cares! YOU DISGUST ME, you don’t hear about the ‘dead beat moms’ and you rarely hear about the great dads in this world. And me being a black male I get the most sh*t! I go out and buy what my daughter needs but when my “baby’s momma” gets that check its off to the bar and when she slides that benefit card through the ATM, it’s off to the weed spot. So do me a favor and shut up!


Why is that Lor? - Posted by Corby

Posted by Corby on February 27, 2002 at 12:44:03:

Why is his post so bad? He asked a simple question. He clearly stated he is not trying to dodge his obligations. BUT I can understand his point 100%. Did you ever think that maybe when the son makes more money he will provide indirect support to his children? Maybe buying them clothes, cars, vacations, etc… HE just doen’t want his sons exwife squandering away HARD earned money.

Just my 2.5 cents worth

Re: Divorce Advice - Posted by Baron

Posted by Baron on February 27, 2002 at 11:52:55:

I’m glad I made your day!

We’re not trying to get out of paying. He loves his sons. We just don’t want to pay for her drugs.

Re: Divorce Advice - Posted by Lor

Posted by Lor on February 28, 2002 at 08:56:41:

I’m sorry I overreacted and this wasn’t an appropriate response for me to post on a good ol’ boy forum like this. I was a social worker for many years and have seen too many children trapped in impoverishment because of deadbeat deads so when I opened your post first thing in the morning alot of old emotions came back.

2 snaps up Greg! - Posted by Corby

Posted by Corby on February 27, 2002 at 17:50:02:

Give he hell!

Re: Divorce Advice - Posted by David

Posted by David on February 27, 2002 at 12:04:38:

If she’s on drugs, why doesn’t your son have custody?

Re: Divorce Advice - Posted by Mark (SDCA)

Posted by Mark (SDCA) on February 28, 2002 at 15:40:14:

Let me ask you this… Have you ever seen the ex wife wearing new dresses all the time while the children have no shoes? I have.
Have you ever seen the ex wife spending NO time with the children but refusing to give up custody since that is her gravy train? I have.
Have you ever seen a woman with no job and FIVE kids by firve different fathers living in a 2 bedroom apartment? I have.
The knife cuts both ways.


Divorce Advice - Posted by Baron

Posted by Baron on February 28, 2002 at 09:11:33:

No offense taken. I agree that there are too many children caught in bad situations. They are innocent victims of childish parental behavior.

Divorce Advice - Posted by Baron

Posted by Baron on February 27, 2002 at 12:07:12:

We’re trying, but for now, she has them and we have to assume she will have them forever. Therefore, we have to make other plans.