Re: If You’re A Successful Black Woman REI - Posted by Jim FL
Posted by Jim FL on August 16, 2001 at 19:57:44:
I’m not going to slam you, or jump all over you as it may seem others have.
Frankly, I agree with the over all sentiment expressed here to you.
I cannot relate totally, because you see, I am white, male, and grew up middle class.
Your typical “White boy” I guess.
I also used to be a cop, and was once married with a step daughter at the time who was mixed.
Before I married that wife, I dated several black women.
I was not out seeking only black women to date, I just happened to meet many nice women who just so happened to be black.
I am not naive enough to think that racism and sexism do not exist in our society, they surely do.
Frankly, before I dated black women, and eventually married someone with a mixed daughter, I was not really aware, I had not really experienced the kind of racist ignorance people often display.
I was a cop at the time, and to be honest, our dept was 90% white males, perhaps 5% white females, 3% hispanic males, and 2% female/male blacks.
I heard the little comments and sick jokes said by my some of my co-workers on occassion. I never really paid it much attention because I just ignore people who are idiots. They are a waste of my time.
Then, when the first dept. FOP formal dinner came where I showed up with a date who was from another race than I, things changed dramatically.
Not with me, just with how I was treated.
I remember the stares, the comments people made under the breath, and even the RUDE people who said things to our faces.
I experienced racism first hand.
and you know what?
It was not just the “White boys” doing it.
I heard more times than I care to count, "Why are you with her, are you just looking for a made to clean up after you and be your servant?"
And this was a common thing to hear, from black folks.
Thankfully, my girlfriend at the time was very intelligent, good looking, and able to ignore most of it.
In fact, we are still friends.
After I got married to wife #2, and had my step daughter, I took her with me everywhere during the summer.
Mommy worked, and I ran my REI business. This meant she and I were a team and did EVERYTHING together.
I was proud to have my beautiful little girl with me.
I enjoyed her company and was very proud to call her my daughter.
I still saw people stare-ing, and heard the little comments made under their breath, but ignored it all.
Who the he!! were these people anyway?
When I would go to a home to talk to sellers, or sign docs, sometimes my daughter was with me.
There was one seller who did have a racist attitude, and expressed it when we signed the deal.
My daughter was not with me this time.
The seller told me that he was moving because his neighborhood was getting “too dark” for him.
He was an idiot, but I wanted his house, so I bought it.
When I went to his home to gather the keys, and take possession, my daughter WAS with me.
He did not say a word! (Smart man, I’m a BIKER with a “Tude” and he certainly did not want to dis my kid or me.)
Anyway, my point is, you will see, hear and maybe have to deal with morons who have an attitude of racism or sexism.
The good news is that in this business, you can choose who to deal with.
If the deal is killer, and you have to tolerate some moronic comments or attitude to get it done, then so be it.
You are making money, and it is all green.
You also have the choice to NOT buy houses from people like this.
ALWAYS keep the attitude that YOU do NOT NEED to buy, the sellers NEED to sell!
If a seller is truly motivated, meaning they NEED to sell, and you are the only one standing their ready to sign, offering them a solution, it just will not matter what their attitude is about race or gender.
And if it does, the he!! with them!
They were not THAT motivated in the first place.
Also, do yourself a favor, and lose the “Handle” you have here now.
Frankly, I think it degrades you.
I could care less if you are brown, or made of sugar.
What you may or may not have to offer me here, or others, will have NOTHING to do whatsoever with your race or gender.
If I give you some advice that helps you close a RE deal, making you thousands of dollars, will you care that I am white?
I don’t think so!
and if you do, too bad!
I’m happy and proud of who and what I am, and it has nothing to do with my race or gender.
(well, a little, I am GLAD I’m a male, we are just lower maintenance physically…
Rather than ask for investors who are successful and black, as for investors who are successful PERIOD!
Find someone who is as successful as you want to be, and emulate them, learn from them, and listen while asking questions.
You can succeed at anything you put your mind to, and the racist idiots be d@&#ed. (sheesh, the CENSOR got me on the original word here. Guess we cannot quote people using that word, or reference common sayings.)