Mapping a Strategy - Posted by Cletus

Posted by Cletus on April 27, 2006 at 24:35:53:

Mapping a Strategy

A while back it occurred to me that if I hammered a nail into a wall-map of my town for every property I?ve looked at, I could get an overall picture of where I?ve been. This could also save me the embarrassment of making a lowball offer on a property I already own and insulting myself.

Anyway, I keep a copy of the tax maps for the areas I farm, and I mark every parcel on the map that hits the MLS, foreclosure market, or any other property I get a whiff of. At first it took a lot of work. I used to cut them out with an Exacto knife, but now I just color them in. I?m glad my friend Mundo clued me in about that trick. It was a turning point to be sure. Although I fondly remember this as my Exacto Mundo phase, I still wanted to take it to the next level. Believe me, having all those maps in your desk drawer has its drawbacks

Anyway, hanging the maps on the wall with nails in the parcels I?ve visited seemed like the next step up. I?m able to tell instantly by the size of the nail how much that property is worth. Bigger the nail, bigger the price. It?s almost brain dead it?s so simple. All I need is my hammer and my assortment of conveniently packaged, 16oz to the box, non-rusty type nails of different sizes. (Just a heads up here, if prices keep acting this drunk, those ?little nails? are gonna hang around for a long time. Nudge nudge if you?re headed to the store for the hardware.)

Anyway, with the maps on the wall I can tell at a glance what parcels I?ve actually looked at over time. And I know by the notes I?ve scribbled on the property?s printout sheet what the FMV of a property should be. Btw, here?s a little tip from ol Cletus, write down your notes while you?re still at the property. If you run out of ink, go back and get some. They all look alike after number seven. Add a six pack, and all the ink in the world won?t help.

Anyway, everything was going fine until today. I looked at six properties. They all needed the BIG nails, if you know what I mean. Unfortunately for me they were all in one condo building on one parcel of land. And I?m sure we can all agree this is gonna need a REALLY big nail. So don?t act like I?m the only one who figured this out. I had to make a special trip to the Nails N Pails just to get one.

Anyway, I take this spike as they called it, back to my apartment and I notice it has a diameter that will darn near take out some of the adjoining plots. So now I gotta look at those properties tomorrow or this whole program will become defective. I hope they?re crack houses. I don?t want to end up needing a bigger spike. I could wipe out the whole block if this keeps up.

Anyway, it seems there was a very expensive, personally autographed tapestry of that singer Tom Jones in his trademark tight pants behind parcel # 065A 210 587. At least that?s what my neighbors claim. When they first heard the banging on the wall they were a little confounded. When that tapestry began to swell at the focal point they thought it was magical. Well, she did at least. I think he always hated that thing. When they saw it was my spike that caused that apparition there were mixed emotions to be sure. At least that?s the way it sounded from my side of the wall.

Anyway, I pulled the spike back to its intended depth and answered the knock on the door. I remember throwing a rock at a hornets? nest when I was a kid, and right about then I had that flashback. Lucky for me I?m a good negotiator. Once I got her to understand the benefits of spending the time to sew up the damaged area herself, a whole new look came upon her as they were leaving. Not sure what he was muttering about as far as her not ever wanting to mend ?his? socks , but at least we?re not calling the lawyers tonight. Perhaps I should have used screws instead.