Meditate on your unfulfilling life… - Posted by HR
Posted by HR on June 04, 2000 at 06:33:25:
Charity,
I had the same fears as you. Haven’t we all at some point? I was scared of losing money. I was scared of losing property. I was scared of losing my good credit rating. I was scared of being scammed by the sub contractors. I was scared of being hurt by my tenants. I was scared about filling out the paperwork wrong and being sued. I was scared about underbidding on property. I was scared about not finding investors to flip to… yada yada yada. About the only thing I wasn’t scared of was my truck… and if you gave me enuf time, I might be able to conjure up some catastrope to worry about there, too.
So how does one get over all these (and other) fears? For me, I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. The fear of my life staying the same was greater than the fear of doing all this new stuff. When another, competing emotion is stronger than the fear, you will overcome the fear.
You can not will yourself over the fear. You can not rationalize yourself over the fear. The fear is a very deep seated, unconscious expression of core beliefs and is not easily overcome. The only way over it is thru it. Because in the end, someone with this level of fear isn’t worried about contracts; it’s about making big personal changes in the way we think, act, make a living, etc. And those kind of personal paradigm shifts are life changing and… fearful.
Now, charity, the stuff that used to make me fearful no longer does. Literally. Looking at houses, estimating repairs, making offers, backing out of offers, finding investors, managing rehab crews, selling the properties, etc etc etc… this really isn’t hard. What’s hard now is doing it all efficiently and effectively for max profit. I laugh at myself now, over what used to worry me. Now, it’s crystal clear that this biz is like all other businesses: the more experience you have doing it, the easier (and more profitable) it gets. It really ain’t rocket science (thank God).
The name of the game is jumping in.
Charity, I saw so many people making so much money, my greed and pride also forced me into the water. They aren’t better people than me. They aren’t smarter. They don’t deserve it more. They just had some knowledge, skills, and experience, and it’s what I needed, so I jumped in. And it hasn’t been NEARLY as bad as I catastrophised it would be.
May I make some suggestions?
First, knowledge helps. I made the BIG mistake of thinking I would FEEL ready when I felt I KNEW enough. Big mistake. Why? Because in rei, with it’s 10,000 things that can go wrong and different, you can never know enough to feel confident in every situation. You can certainly know enuf to get started. But not enuf to feel like you can cover your fanny for whatever may hit you… which is what I realized later I was unconsciously trying to do. Solution: have a good re team around you. I’ve joined my local reia group and have great support/advice there. I’ve found a great re attorney, and have great support there. My cpa is also invaluable. Find individuals, in other words, whose job is getting folks out of binds when they find themselves in them, and you will be ok when you fall into a puddle.
Charity, you are also a realtor. Recognize that you have been conditioned (brainwashed) by your training to look suspect at rei. When my wife got her training, I even had to deprogram her a little to accept some of the creative stuff as legal and do-able. Your knowledge and access to the mls is invaluable. Now learn how to use it to make serious money, not as Robert Kiyosaki says, “tips.” And he’s right: realtors work for tips when they could be making the big bucks.
Finally, close friends of mine just completed their adoption of a girl from Guatamala. She is beautiful, and they are so happy. The process, as you know better than any of us, was difficult and fraught with uncertainty. Think of it as a metaphor, Charity, for rei. It really is a good one. Just as you have succeeded there, you can succeed in rei as well. It too will reward you with a “baby” of sorts, more wealth, cash flow, etc and these too are good things.
Meditate on this stuff, and what you want for your family. You will never overcome the fear; your other, stronger emotions will push you reluctantly thru the fear, until, one day, you will find yourself on the other side, and say, “Now that wasn’t all that bad; what was I so scared of?”
Good luck! Congrats on your adoption.
HR
